Favorite Songs and Preferences

For a really long time, I'm not sure how long, I didn't have preferences. Preferences, although simple and natural, give space for hurt. I knew that if I had a preference towards a certain band or song, that someone could shoot down that band and thereby shoot me down. I had a difficult time separating myself from the things I was interested in, so, until around 2 weeks ago, I deleted my preferences. Clean slate, written upon by my friends and family, until their preferences became my own. 

I'm not sure if others can relate to this, but I was taken aback when a few of my friends not only had preference, but fought for them. A friend desperately loving Switchfoot and Relient K, and another loving KKB and Vulfpeck — bands I had either never heard of or never cared to listen to. Over and over, the same would happen with TV shows, music, games, movies, activities, art and design. WHAT?? Okay, maybe I'm the only person who finds this strange.

Growing up, if I had a preference for a certain musician, I would enter into a lengthy process where someone I loved, usually my father or friends, would tear apart that musician and return to me their judgement and opinions. Usually, this would cause me to turn and walk away from that preference for the sake of the person I valued. WHAT BULL. I wish someone had urged me to explore my interests, instead of just adopting them from others. 

I can tie every band I've loved to a person I was consumed with at that point in my life, and I don't think this is a healthy pattern. I've realized that I also adopt behaviors and viewpoints from those I love, many times compromising my own values for the company of a preferred friend or family member. 

So maybe... Maybe my preference is for people? 

This semester, I know God is refreshing my preferences. I want His desires, and through that, He is giving me back passion.

Peep into my life by reading Psalm 36 in it's entirety.